My friend Hazel and I decided that we needed to get out of town last year. So we found a [really] little cabin and went there. 3 adults, 2 kids, 1 dog. And it was so great, we did it better this time. 6 days in Lake Geneva. 6 adults, 3 kids, 4 dogs, and a cat.

Adam and I are both introverts, and so is one of our dogs. Our house is often very quiet. We are not used to lots of people. It’s possible we talk to the dogs more than to each other. (Fact check: false.) So going to a house with two other families is not what we’re used to, and it is a wonderful vacation from our lives. There is always something going on. It is loud, fun, rambunctious, and stressful. We love it for a week.

It makes us wonder, should we have had kids?

Yes. And no. I’m sure if we had any kids, we would be overcome with love and wouldn’t be able to imagine life without them.

But I’m just saying–we came home and packed 5 days of sleeping into an afternoon, and it was glorious.

“I’ve got 99 uses, but the trash ain’t one.” -Jewel grocery bags  

Okay. Let’s think about this. Really? 99? I’m willing to bet I’m as creative as the ad agency on this one, yet, I can’t possibly think of 99 uses for a heavy plastic bag. But damn if I’m not gonna try.

1. To put stuff in.
2. To wear when pants are torn, a la Linda from Bob’s Burgers.
3. To wear on head to keep hair dry in pool, like the crazy lady who taught with me my first year at the J.
4. On that note, to suffocate people with. (We were always a little worried when that lady put her hair up, because she started with it over her whole face.)
5. To line ice chests that have been in the basement so you can procrastinate washing them.
6. I suppose if there are enough of them, they could be a pillow.
7. Or a blanket.
8. Sleeping bag for Barbie.
9. Yard waste bag for Barbie.
10. House for Hard Times Barbie™
11. Musical instrument!
12. Food plates/bowls?
13. Barf bag.
14. Dry erase board

You know what? I’m going to stop there. These are not good reasons, and I could probably think of more dumb reasons, so I’ll give it to them. However, I’m going to revise their statement:

“I’ve got 99 uses, if you really reach, and the trash is probably one of the better ones, but please recycle instead. Yay bags!”

But I can see why they went with the former.