A few years ago, I knew I had to change my way of thinking. I was still teaching (still am. Still, still, still) but rather than cursing my luck, I decided to start thinking about it as a video game. Each year, I would try to beat the level. I had failed so far, but it’s a game, so it’s more fun, and big deal if I have to start at the beginning of the level. It’s annoying, but I had faith that one day I would get to the end, even if I was just discovering that our princess was in another castle.

So I told my therapist Lizzie, and she thought for a second, looking dubious*. Then she said this**:

“Rather than thinking you failed, why don’t you think about it this way: You’re holding an ice cube. You have warmed up that ice cube in your hand. It’s still frozen, but it’s frozen at 29 degrees*****. It might have started at 2 degrees. So you’re much closer to melting that ice cube, even though it’s still frozen.”

I think the point was that you’re always doing the work. And that is a relief to hear.

 

 

*I know from dubious because it was Strikes the cat’s resting face.

**It’s not word perfect. Don’t @ me.***

***as the kids say.****

****and by kids, I just mean people on Twitter, I guess. Do they even say that anymore? I’m sure I’m behind. I’m old. I haven’t downloaded any new music in 2 decades, and the fact that I only listen to things I download should tell you just how old I am. I still refer to “tapes.” Tapes! I’m an audiobook narrator, for gods’ sake.

*****Fahrenheit. This is Amur’cuh, goddamn it.